Southwest cancels hundreds more flights; passengers stranded. It’s part of Southwest’s new marketing slogan: “You are now free to move about the country, but good luck getting home.”

World swim body aims for more integrity, better marketing. The World swim body doesn’t expect many proposals citing a shallow applicant pool.

Israeli archaeologists discover an ancient winemaking complex. The discovery came after the archaeologists found several empty boxes of Franzia.

App designed to save lives not popular with Florida teachers. The app maker shouldn’t feel bad being unpopular with FL teachers since there’s also a vaccine designed to save lives.

Facebook will now ban the sale of protected Amazon rainforest land on Marketplace. Since the rainforest is huge, sellers reported being tired of replying “yes it’s available”.

Google Maps will now help travelers find the most eco-friendly route. Travelers who want to go from NYC to Boston have the option of riding a bike for 22 hours.

Another company is offering edge-of-space balloon trips for $50,000. That sounds like a good deal compared to other space rides until you realize it’s 4 military balloons and a lawn chair.

A recent poll shows that Americans agree misinformation is a problem. Another poll finds that Americans also agree that problems are the problem.

Smart robots are set to do all the work at Nissan’s ‘intelligent’ plant. Which is amazing until you realize a robot will have to restock the vending machine.

California governor vetoes bill to pay people to stay sober. After which the Governor celebrated with a Four Loco.

Nashville files lawsuit to shut down a hot tub party vehicle. The owners are experimenting with their new idea: helicopter pool parties.

Doctors grow frustrated over COVID-19 denial, misinformation. The doctors were reassured by evolutionists saying that it won’t last forever.

New Zealand admits it can no longer get rid of coronavirus. The good news however is that it never had Florida.

Pat Robertson steps down as host of long-running ’700 Club’. The host said in a briefing that he can no longer host the 700 club because he’s turning 800.

Pat Robertson steps down as host of long-running ’700 Club’.  To celebrate Robertson said he’s buying 700 club sandwiches.

Ex-Facebook manager alleges social network fed Capitol riot. The good news is that next Jan 6 Facebook will put together videos celebrating all the new friendships.

Crews race to limit damage from major California oil spill. Afterwards, many restaurant owners went down to the beaches to refill their fryers.

Brief outage in Albuquerque after 2 balloons hit power lines. Luckily no one was physically injured, just one old man’s emotions as he floated away in a house.

Man opens emergency door, jumps onto wing of plane in Miami. During the man’s arrest, authorities had to explain to him the meaning of wing-man.  

Beyond and Impossible are joining a crowded plant-based chicken market. This only comes after the companies failed to make it in the chicken-based plant market.

‘SNL’ is returning with all but one incumbent cast member as well as adding 3 new members. There are so many people in the cast now, that Dick Wolf is jealous.

Connecticut site allows people to self-exclude from gambling. These people are likely to get nowhere without betting on themselves.

Bonus checks bounce for 50 Florida teachers due to error. Turns out that personal budgeting isn’t taught there.

Boeing to build military aircraft drones in an Australian city. For increased productivity, Boeing thought they needed Men at Work.

The EU demands a single plug for phones. Fathers everywhere will be forced to throw out the old box of cords.

Oldest human footprints in North America found in New Mexico. They were found beside a heart with “Chad + Ashley”